Alison Smith
Blog

Balance in Life

1 February 2012

Following on from yesterday's blog on life balance - Susan Jeffers has a model that I often use with clients to explain why we should aim for 'life balance' and not 'work/life balance'.

The model Susan uses splits our life into different areas such as the 9 listed below (each of us may have different words but she encourages readers to identify 9).

Each of the 9 areas provides us with something we need in life. What they are and what they provide will be different for each of us and link to our own individual hierarchy of values. It's this hierarchy and our ability to meet these unconscious desires that will ultimately determine our level of motivation, satisfaction and yes even wellbeing.

So for example: Work may give us Achievement, relationships may provide Love, hobbies may bring Spirit, leisure may provide Freedom and friendship may bring Connection. In the short term if we don't get Achievement, Love, Spirit, Freedom AND Connection we we may not notice any ill effect. In the long term, however, if all we're getting is achievement then our lack of love, spirit, freedom and connection will make itself heard one way or another - feeling unfulfilled, lack of motivation, unhappiness and yes even illness.

In essence one area cannot meet all our needs. Therefore in order to have a life that ensures all values are being met it is important to have activities in a number of different areas. So work cannot be someone’s whole life – in order to function, in order to get what they need to survive they need to do other things. In the example above they need to spend time on work, in a relationship, on leisure, on a hobby, with family and friends, on personal growth, contributing and with their higher self. It’s not just because other people want them to but in order to meet their own unconscious physical, mental, emotional and spiritual needs.

What areas of your life do you have too high expectations of by spending all your time on them? How can you find more balance in life?

Alison

Alison Smith
Helping you keep on track by aligning action to your values
alison@alisonsmith.eu 07770 538159

Do you want work/life balance or life balance?

31 January 2012



Like many people I'd always used the term 'work/life balance' until I applied a tool I use in coaching to myself and realised the term I was using was half the problem, for me anyway, and that was because of the images using that term painted for me and the impact they then had on my stress levels.

At the start of the session my goal was to understand what I needed to do it ā€˜have work/life balance’. As I wrote at the time 'like a lot of people I never seem to have enough time and energy to do everything. I feel like I’m a hamster in its wheel. In fact I have two wheels, one wheel for work and one for the rest of my life.' Stress then came from trying to balance both wheels. When on one wheel I worried about the other and vice verse.

Just writing that down seemed to shift something. I realised, for me, balance would only be achieved when I only had one wheel to manage. Thus 'having life balance’ allowed me to, even if only metaphorically, have more control over my life and what I chose to do with it.

I'd be interested in the metaphors you have for life or work/life balance and wonder how those metaphors may help in understanding what needs to change to simply reduce the internal stress of trying to manage it all.

Alison

Alison Smith
Helping individuals and teams stay on track by finding balance
alison@alisonsmith.eu 07770 538159

I've shared more on life balance on this blog too using Susan Jeffesr model as a base.

Wellbeing Champions

13 January 2012



Earlier this week I tweeted that 'it's in all the ways we can't see that we make the biggest difference'.

Is our quest for wellbeing any different. Whilst we can educate, inform, blog and even provide policies that support wellbeing, is it enough to inspire others to be motivated to make the necessary changes? For me it’s all the small things we do and are seen to do that provide the inspiration. As I was reminded before Christmas when someone sent me a note to say ā€˜you inspire me to live more healthily’. I know this comes from how I am in the world and in all the small things I tweet/blog/chat and share photo's about (as above) rather than the work I get paid to do.

In any organisation, therefore, the key is identifying those individuals who influence others behaviours and ensuring they are seen to be demonstrating the behaviours that support wellbeing. Many organisations won’t stand a cat in hells chance of having wellbeing if those with the most influence ignore and override the signs of stress, have no life balance, don’t take their holiday’s, skip lunch, live on adrenaline and coffee when adrenaline is lacking and/or are known to consume a week’s allowance of alcohol every Friday night?

Who are your wellbeing champions – and how can you ensure they are able to express how they achieve wellbeing rather than hide it?

Alison

Alison Smith
Helping procurement teams find balance and wellbeing and keep on track

TRUST in the Toolkit for 2012

9 January 2012

Yesterday I added Excellence into the toolkit for 2012 based on Cirque Du Soleil's way of being in everything that they do. Today I'd like to put TRUST into the toolkit.

It's obvious in the picture above and this wonderful video, both from Cirque Du Soleil, that the performers are required to put 100% trust in their colleagues - both those on and off stage.

Having just finished my own personal training session I realise that they also have to trust themselves. My personal trainer has just added another 5kg to my weights and I was certainly doubting my ability to do the exercise. The negative chatter started as I told myself:

  • I can't do this

  • I'll drop it

  • I'll hurt myself

  • I'll fail


  • My personal trainer trusted I'd be able to do it. It was just lack of trust in myself that was generating the less than positive thoughts. Which, of course, in turn made what I was doing so much more difficult.

    But something changed today, and that's because I didn't grumble to my personal trainer, I didn't give voice to my doubts, I simply told myself I could do it and got on with it. And in so doing realised:

  • I can do this

  • I can keep hold of it

  • I can stay safe

  • I can and will succeed


  • How is lack of trust in yourself stopping you achieving your goals and what do you need to stop telling yourself to succeed?

    Alison

    Alison Smith
    Helping you trust yourself and stay on track in 2012
    #2012toolkit

    Your Toolkit for 2012

    9 January 2012

    In order to achieve our goals in 2012 we will each be drawing daily on our internal resources. These internal resources might include: perseverance, trust, action, communication or laughter etc. The key to success is accessing these resources when they're needed - it's no use perfecting our communication skills when action is required, or taking action when focusing on what direction that action should be in is paramount.

    I've noticed however that we often react unconsciously to situations using the most obvious resource or one that we find easy to use. You'll certainly find my answer to many situations is yet more communication :-). The difficulty with that strategy is that it often doesn't work, or makes our goal harder not easier to achieve. It's a bit like using the wrong sized screwdriver - you might make it work but it will take more time and you might ruin the thread of the screw on the way. This year I really do wish every one of us a year to remember for all the right reasons. To assist I'm going to be blogging regularly about the many resources - tools if you will - that we may have in our personal toolkits but may be wary of using. Do feel free to suggest some resources you'd like me to cover. Why not join the discussion on my facebook page where collaboration, loyalty and excellence are some of today's suggestions.

    As a start to your toolkit development you may also like these notes from a session I facilitated entitled 'Keeping on Track in a downturn' where the final resource suggested was AUTHENTICITY.

    Looking forward to a wonderfully inspiring and delightful 2012
    Alison

    Alison Smith
    Helping procurement teams stay on track in 2012
    alison@alisonsmith.eu 07770 538159

    The end of your world could be upon you!

    3 January 2012

    The end of your world could be upon you.... and I don't mean 21st December 2012 I mean today, tomorrow or if you're lucky some future date many days from today - but it will come.

    Why?

    Because none of us know how much longer we will be here - and as hard as that sounds it's a fact.
    I'd love to start the year as I normally do with plenty of tips on goal setting and how to keep on track (and I promise they will come). However they will be very much future orientated and some of us many not be here to reap the rewards. That is:

    • We eat well or exercise today in order to be healthy tomorrow

    • We work hard in order to get some result in the future

    • We learn so that we may apply it next week

    • and we procrastinate plenty and put things off until another day (or is that just me?)

    The picture above is one of the daily photo's I sent a friend from August 26th last year shortly after her prognosis until she went into the hospice late in November before dying peacefully in her sleep on 28th December - 4 months later. Each picture was my invitation to her to remember to:
    • Stay in the moment

    • Enjoy each day

    • Remember she was loved

    • Speak from the heart

    • Leave nothing unsaid

    • Find gratitude in the small things

    • Laugh

    • Remember and appreciate the good times
    That is to believe in tomorrow but live for today.

    I'm not suggesting we stop setting goals, exercising or eating healthily. What I am suggesting is we find some time each day to really live for today - because we really don't know how many more of them we may have. I'm sure my friend, and her husband on their holiday abroad in July, were busy imagining a very different Christmas and New Year with their family to the one that enfolded. They had many precious moments between August 26th and December 28th but many of those were because they knew the end of her world was near.

    It's easy to act is if it's never going to happen - this blog is a reminder that it will - don't let those small moments pass YOU by.

    In loving memory of a friend who will be sadly missed x

    Nothing is impossible

    11 September 2011

    This picture defies logic and is a great example that anything is possible if we just take some time and patience to find the solution and explore the opportunities.

    With thanks to Responsible fishing UK for Fantastic picture - more stunning photo's of balance can be found on their Facebook page and web site.

    When someone says "Chocolate" what do you think of?

    1 September 2011



    I was reminded of an exercise I use with groups when in a session with internal stakeholders of a procurement team last week.

    In the exercise I ask everyone to write the first eight words that come to mind when they hear the word ā€œchocolateā€. They then spend some time comparing their answers with others in the room. There is a whole range of possible answers, that could include:

    Milk, dark, bitter, bake, dog, buttons, sweet, good, bad, healthy, unhealthy, bar, biscuits, strawberries, cocoa, Fairtrade, relaxation, fountain, Labrador, sugar, hot, fattening, present, gift, orange, yucky, yummy.

    The one word that seems to come up most often is milk, shared by about three-quarters of the group. The second most common word is usually shared with less than half of the people participating in the exercise. Very soon we’re looking at just a small percentage of people sharing a word. Sometimes someone may not share a single word with anyone in the room. Generally most people will have three or four associated words that are unique to them.

    It’s clear that even for a simple word such as chocolate there are different things going on in our minds when we hear it. It’s this meaning to us that will impact our actions, reactions, words and behaviours and yet we often use words assuming a common understanding.

    In last week’s meeting I realised every internal stakeholder in the room had a different interpretation for ā€œprocurementā€. When the stakeholder heard the phrase ā€œbest practice procurementā€ their interpretation of procurement meant they thought they were already doing it. Continuing to use the word wasn’t going to change that so we had to start using new words that expanded their understanding.

    New words that enabled them to understand in much more detail what was involved in the Initiate Project, Research & Analyse, Develop Strategy, Implement Strategy and Implement Contract steps.

    The next time you’re not getting the response you’re expecting, it might be that they consider what you’re talking about to be yucky, not yummy.


    Also blogged on Supply Management. Image from Dogs & Puppies

    Landscaping Your Life Principles

    1 September 2011

    The following list is included on many posters and suggests its origins come from the native american culture and is often titled:

    The Ten Indian Commandments

  • Treat the earth and all that dwell thereon with respect

  • Remain close to great spirit

  • Show great respect for your fellow beings

  • Work together for the benefit of all mankind

  • Give assistance and kindness wherever needed

  • Do what you know to be right

  • Look after the well being of mind & body

  • Dedicate a share of your efforts to the greater good

  • Be truthful and honest at all times

  • Take full responsibility for your actions


  • Irrespective of who really first said them, if we connected in this way with the landscape and others on this planet of ours, then I certainly think we'll find our connection within more easily. Do join me on my Landscaping Your Life facebook page where I share more on the process that uses landscapes as metaphors for life. Although I'm starting to think that perhaps landscapes are really a mirror for our lives not simply a metaphor.

    Image used from The History of Pachakamak

    Keeping on Track in a Downturn

    30 August 2011


    The following contains details of the initial discussion undertaken during a group session I facilitated using the FCP process some time ago that I've sent to a few people recently and thought may provide insight at this time too.

    Here's the first few insights - if you're interested in further insights then there's a link to the remaining pdf containing the full notes at the end.

    You broke through your closed shell of isolation into a true understanding and experience of team work.

    There are 3 aspects to this card:

  • breaking through the closed shell of isolation

  • true understanding of teamwork

  • true experience of teamwork


  • It’s certainly very difficult to keep on track if we isolate ourselves, so too if we experience teamwork where everyone operates in their own silos.

    Perhaps we’re being asked to consider what breaking through our closed shell of isolation into a true understanding and experience of teamwork would look, sound and feel like or perhaps it’s a reminder we’re already doing it.

    Peace
    It’s very easy to think we’ll calm down or take time out once we’ve finished everything, once the downturn is over. Here we’re being asked to bring a quality of peace into our lives now. Knowing that from that place of peace we’re more likely to make better decisions and wiser choices.

    The session concluded with the mentor of Authenticity ....Continued

    The process, the insight, setback and mentor cards used here are from the Frameworks for Change Ā© Innerlinks - www.innerlinks.com

    Image from Andrew Jones Photography (my brother too :-))

    Comparisons

    29 August 2011

    I was asked today for a copy of a story I'd written and thought I'd share it here too.

    Here's the first few para's and then a link to the full version (It's a short story so only 2 pages long).

    ā€œiPhone iPhone in my hand who is the fairest in the landā€ Eleanor said out loud hoping against all hope that the answer would be ā€œEleanor is the fairest in the landā€ and was therefore very disappointed when the answer was someone in Norway she’d never heard of.

    Like a lot of people Eleanor had been delighted when a new iPhone application has been launched. It was a comparison application but instead of comparing prices it compared skills and attributes. Within a week she’d discovered that she didn’t have the thinnest ankles, the glossiest hair, the whitest teeth or the most perfect breasts. She’d also discovered that she wasn’t the best nonfiction writer, communication trainer, motivational speaker or career coach. With every question she asked she found out that someone else was better than her. Her mood therefore took a huge turn for the worse and friends and family got very wary of speaking to her. Nothing they said seemed to make any difference. In fact it made matters worse because when they listed something they thought she excelled in – she just asked the iPhone and it gave her the name of someone else. To her every name was more evidence that she wasn’t good at anything even if she didn’t always agree with the answer the phone gave. To Eleanor there was a whole world out there better at everything than her with better skills, better minds and certainly better bodies. Whenever she thought she might have found a question that would give her the answer she craved she was always disappointed – the best bathroom went to a couple in Hong Kong and even the cleanest small bedroom window facing west (when she’d started to clutch at straws) went to a man in Canada.

    Continued

    Bad apples just get more rotten – it’s time to change the metaphor

    11 August 2011


    I have been inundated with examples of the different ways we can view good and bad over the last week and thought I’d share the thoughts that have arisen for me:

    One key conversation was with a friend about being a ā€˜good person’ vs a ā€˜bad person.’

    I agree certain behaviours are bad (although I’m pretty sure we’ll all have different scales for what goes where) but that doesn’t make the people doing them bad. If we continue to label others as bad then it’s not long before we continue with that metaphor and believe them to be rotten, like an apple, and therefore useless. The only option then is for them to be discarded. As a metaphor it’s not got a lot going for it, it certainly doesn’t provide a lot of options other than perhaps to bury the apple and hope the seeds have some life left in them!

    I wondered what might be a more helpful and resourceful metaphor – what about:

    Tomatoes – because they need the right soil, nutrients, feeding, watering, heat and light. This is they need TLC and the right conditions to enable them to flourish. Although perhaps unhelpful when thrown at others rather than eaten as part of a healthy diet.

    Flowers – what I like about this metaphor is flowers can flourish in many environments despite the lack of the ā€˜right’ conditions. But constant lack of any of the right conditions will certainly not allow for a flourishing, vigorous and beautiful flower.

    With both these examples at least it’s easier to understand what is needed to ensure the plant flourishes and contributes to the garden. It’s also useful to consider the impact of the greenhouse, the gardener and tools used because ultimately these too will determine the extent to which the plants flourish.

    What metaphors do you use to describe others and in what way might these be unhelpful to finding a solution to the issue.

    Alison

    Alison Smith
    Helping Teams see the Wood for the Trees

    For more on the Landscaping your Life metaphor I use with individuals and teams do visit my facebook and youtube pages. You may also like a recent blog on Growing your own stakeholders on Supply Management.

    Nettles and Dock Leaves

    9 August 2011

    One way of interpreting this combination of plants is that an opportunity to solve a problem is never that far away. To explore this more fully I thought I'd use the Frameworks for change Coaching Process to see what other insights might be available especially on this #riotcleanup day here in the UK:

    Insight: You express honesty and truthfulness in each moment.
    When ever I look at nature I am always reminded that each flower and plant offers it's own uniqueness and ask myself why we constantly try to be like other people rather than accept we are who we are in all our uniqueness. Of course this is also true in reverse why do we so often try to get everyone to be like us and not not accept and embrace their uniqueness?

    Setback: You are setback by ARROGANCE in the present situation
    I wonder whether this a continuation of the last point i.e. it's easy to believe we're a Dock Leaf providing healing balm to those stung rather than accept that we might just be the nettle. Isn't it useful to be reminded that sometimes we're the ones capable of stinging others too? We may have other virtues but we all come with beliefs, skills or behaviours some might perceive as negative and unhelpful. To move forward it's about us all releasing the setback of believing we're better than others and accepting and embracing ours and their uniqueness.

    Insight: You value and express the quality of SUPPORT in the current situation
    You might see that the Dock Leaf supports the Nettle and perhaps that's the point - that we each need others around us who can support us and point out our less positive traits so that we may learn and grown. This of course is infinitely more possible if we've let the arrogance go. Who are you supporting today?

    Mentor: Transformation
    If we took on the beliefs and behaviours of our role model for transformation what difference would that make - what would we be thinking, what would we be saying and what would we be doing differently? One question - What's stopping us?

    I hope you found this helpful. If so you may find the notes from the session entitled 'Keeping on track in a downturn' helpful too. I love that the final mentor was Authenticity. It's certainly a great process for use in groups as well as in coaching sessions.

    Helping, ok nudging, us all to realise our potential
    Alison
    alison@alisonsmith.eu 07770 538159

    The process, the insight, setback and mentor cards used here are from the
    Frameworks for Change Ā© Innerlinks - www.innerlinks.com.

    Nameste or Oel ngati kameie

    4 August 2011


    Someone tweeted "Namaste" yesterday and I was reminded of my blog from a few years ago and wanted to share it again here today:

    Nameste or Oel ngati kameie? Both of these are greetings and I wonder how different our relationships at work would be if we used them – although I would suggest that Namaste might be easier to say :-)

    When you greet someone with hello what are you thinking about? I’d suggest very little. It’s often just a word at the top of an email or the start of the conversation and is simply a means to the rest of the conversation. I wonder if the other person even registers it.

    When I watched the film Avatar I loved the Na’vi’s welcome ā€œOel ngati kameieā€ which translates as ā€œI see you.ā€ I see you feels to me like an appreciation of the person with whom we’re communicating. Surely such an appreciation would be a great way to start any conversation - in spirit if not word.

    The Sanskrit word Nameste has a similar meaning. One translation I particularly like, although perhaps not strictly grammatically accurate, is ā€œI honour the spirit in you.ā€ On researching for this blog I realise there are other words that are used around the globe for hello which have similar meanings and these include Aloha, Shalom, Salaam etc.

    I like that these start the conversation recognising and appreciating a connection between both/all parties. I just wonder what difference it would make if we used them more regularly at work - even just in our heads.

    The responses to the blog at the time suggested that just remembering to say "good morning" could make as much difference and my response to that was:

    It's perhaps not the word but the intent that matters. Hello can illicit the same response if said with meaning and a desire to connect as much as any of my other suggestions.

    Au Revior (until we meet again here or in person)

    Let go

    3 August 2011


    At this time of year I get quite a few butterflies in my office. They generally flutter about the room and then head back off to the window.

    The common trait as they search for the open window (at the bottom) is they head up to the top panel of glass, then they come down and then get stuck between the 2 panes of glass. Once they stop trying so heard to fly up and relax they fall through the very small gap between the two panes as this video shows.

    Next time you're stuck in a situation it might be useful to consider there may be less obvious options available that require no effort at all.

    Do come visit me on YouTube or Facebook for more on #Landscapingyourlife.

    What ends up in your personal junk folder

    3 August 2011



    I tweeted recently that unless we follow people we disagree with our twitter feed is likely to represent and not challenge our view of the world. That’s no different in other areas of our life. That is what we pay attention to will normally support our worldview.

    There’s approximately 2 billion pieces of data coming into our senses every second!! With that much data available it would be easy to get overloaded. It’s our Reticular Activating System (RAS) that acts as a filter – it’s a tracking system that brings to our attention data that it thinks is important to us. It’s basically a SPAM filter which bases its assessment of importance on if:

    • It is important to our survival
    • It is different or out of the norm
    • It has emotional content for us personally
    • It supports our beliefs
    • It helps us achieve our goals

    And everything else ends up in Junk mail.

    This is why, once we set goals, we start to notice information that will help us achieve them – whether that’s useful information or people. Or why suddenly there are more cars the same as our new one on the road.

    There’s much we can do to become more aware and even set our own SPAM filter to ensure we’re not missing vital information. I just wanted to remind you that your beliefs will determine what you notice. For example I bet you can give me recent examples of drivers of white van's (hijacking a common belief here in the UK about their bad driving for a moment) who were driving recklessly and didn’t notice the larger percentage of occasions where they were courteous.

    How do your criteria need redefining to stop useful information going into your junk mail?


    Helping you realise the potential of Procurement

    Alison


    Effective Tweeting at conferences

    2 August 2011


    I’ve vicariously followed many conferences on Twitter over the last couple of years and the following is a summary of my tips on engaging more effectively for all involved (audience, speakers & organisers).

    NB: Obviously, in sharing, some of my own behaviours and beliefs about use of SoMe will become apparent. I’ve also made assumptions about the objectives of each of the groups involved. In other words these might not all apply – so do please share your tips so that we make this a more comprehensive list.

    Attendees


  • Understand your objective for tweeting from the conference.

  • Understand your preferred learning style and know if tweeting during the speeches will support or hinder the objectives you have for attendance – better to share learning and engage with twitter after the speech or even event if you know that will work best for you.

  • Find out and use the #conferencehashtag.

  • Find out and use the @speakerstwittername.

  • Tweeting ā€œgreat speech from @speakerā€ is ok but does this meet your objectives and does it help your followers and the followers of the #hashtag?

  • ā€œGreat speech from @ speaker @#hashtag because I learnt this, will do this differently or even because he made me laugh, cry, jump up and downā€ is much better.

  • Remember the conference is a wonderful opportunity to talk to new people not tweet to people you already have a connection with – you can catch up with them as you travel home?


  • Speakers


  • Ensure tweet profile is up to date and ensure profile or more recent tweet provides links to website/blog or other means of finding out what you do (you might not use twitter but much of the audience might).

  • Ensure people at the conference know your @twittername – getting it into your intro would be GREAT.

  • Understand what your objectives are for your audience and encourage tweets that support or reinforce that.
    (My concern is if we’re busy tweeting what you said will that translate into insight or action in the future? I do think tweeting can keep us at theoretical level rather than applying it. Evidence from conferences I’ve followed would support that as there is a distinct lack of sharing on things beyond what was being said. I’ve often asked what will you do differently and get NO reply – is that because people don’t know because they were too busy tweeting what was said? I get plenty of engagement otherwise.)

  • Engage with those tweeting about your speech (More often than not I will follow someone who does that whether it’s my tweet they’ve replied to or someone else’s. It’s a great way of reinforcing a point or clarifying it).

  • If you’re tweeting about another speaker use their @twittername.


  • Organisers


  • Consider employing professional tweeters to raise profile of conference ahead of and during conference.

  • Agree and communicate in all marketing literature and tweet the #conferencehashtag – not halfway through the first day please.

  • Engage with attendees before the event (ask for twitter name in registration) – about #hashtag, speakers, venue, accommodation, food, networking opportunities etc.

  • Ensure all speakers know each other’s @twitternames.

  • Engage with those tweeting especially those using incorrect #hashtag.

  • Regularly tweet, throughout the conference, what the #hashtag means with links.

  • Ensure you have a transcript of #hashtagtweets at the end so those attending, those in different #timezones or those finding #hashtag later in day can review what’s been said.

  • Which is why employing a professional tweeter makes sense.


  • Hope something here has helped - do share your tips too.

    Speaker Authenticity - it's more than truth telling

    1 August 2011

    Authenticity is something that is often mentioned as an aspiration of speakers. As a speaker myself and writing this to other speakers I think it’s useful to remember that we all judge others by our own definition. That is we each have our own definition, so too our colleagues, other speakers and audiences.

    I’d suggest therefore that understanding our own and other’s views on authenticity may be useful. Without that understanding how can we ensure when speaking we avoid following others’ advice to become more authentic when that very action could make us less so.

    This weekend I found myself tweeting the following in response to an exchange from other twits at @influence11 (see #nsa11) a conference of professional speakers in California:

    alisonrbcm: challenge is that sometimes following others advice can take you away from being authentic and make it more 'manufactured'

    alisonrbcm: wonder if telling it {the story} to be of service vs telling it to make more sales also makes a difference on authenticity felt by audience

    alisonrbcm: something about congruency with self and not congruency with what we think we have to be to be accepted

    These reflect the feeling I have that authenticity is more than simply truth telling, more than just not lying and yes even more than showing vulnerability. Looking on the internet for a definition I liked the one over on Wiki:

    "Authenticity is the degree to which one is true to one's own personality, spirit, or character, despite these {external} pressures."

    If this is true then it’s perhaps easier to see how we can determine whether we’re achieving this for ourselves – but how can we assess others against this? How can we know if someone is being true to their spirit? I’d love to know how YOU know.

    For me my assessment has an energetic component ie where do I feel the speaker’s communication is coming from: ie their head, heart, spirit or body and where is it going to: ie my head, heart, spirit, back of the room or someplace else? Which is why I will disagree with many when I only feel the connection from the speaker’s head to mine rather than more deeply heart to heart or spirit to spirit.

    I've raised a discussion in LinkedIn to share your thoughts - do join us there.

    Don't speak ill of another

    26 July 2011

    I saw a tweet the other day that said ā€œDon’t speak ill of others – write it in the sand by the water’s edge.ā€ Which I paid attention to for reasons that become clear if you visit the #landscapingyourlife facebook page which the photo above was taken for.

    What interested me on Sunday, as I took the picture and posted it on Twitter, was how apt it was for twitter that day. My twitter feed was full of people speaking ill of those that were making the headlines over the weekend.

    I was reminded of a video from 1992, which I only recently saw, where a 12 year old reminded us that adults tell children not to do things and then promptly do them all themselves. On twitter and even on other blogs I can see adults doing what they tell children off for doing and that’s ā€˜calling others names’ or labelling them as this or judging them as that. How can we know these words to be true, what reason is there for doing it and what’s the positive outcome?

    My suggestion today is if we wouldn’t let our child say the words about someone at school don’t say them about someone else.

    Alison

    Alison Smith
    Helping teams realise their potential

    PS: Authentic Power’s blog yesterday on not judging her mother is another great reminder about the impact we have when we attach judgement to others. Another piece by Julia Hill perhaps more related to the landscape metaphors I mentioned earlier said ā€I thought to myself, how in the world do we think we can end the clear-cutting on the planet if we’re so effective at clear-cutting each otherā€

    All you need is some extra motivation

    26 July 2011


    My favourite phrase is by Guillaume Apollinaire and says:

    "Come to the edge" he said.
    They said "We are afraid"
    "Come to the edge" he said.
    They came. He pushed them.
    And they flew.

    This quote has never been so apt as it was this morning as I watched fledgling seagull twins (see picture of them with one parent) as they were fed by their parents. They’ve not long left their nest and for the next few weeks they will spend much of the time on the ground being fed by their parents as they learn to fly. As in previous years their initial flying attempts are over walls and more hop like than flight and will go on for many days/weeks as their confidence and flying and feeding skills develop.

    This morning I realised, however, that they could perhaps fly sooner if they had sufficient motivation. A third chick appeared and the parents of the twins made it very clear it was not welcome and were attacking it. I could not believe the flight this chick then took – over the road, over gardens aerial acrobatics at it’s very best as it was chased by one of the parents.

    I wonder how often in life we all need that extra motivation to get moving?

    Landscaping Your Life

    21 July 2011

    I will be developing a new blog to cover this new tool but for the time being just wanted to let you know all about Landscaping Your Life (LYL) - as I'm very excited.

    It's been a friend since I developed it 10 years ago. It uses landscapes as metaphors for life. You know the sort of thing: stuck in a rut, walking through mud, going around the bend, going with the flow, plain sailing etc. In essence LYL helps you effortlessly (because we're using a metaphor) plot a route from where you are to where you want to be and take the necessary steps to get there.

    It's very flexible. So, whilst if the weather is fine I do like to get management teams outside walking around real landscapes, photographs work just as well - it's just a different process. In fact many of those who were at the very first LYL session in the early 'oo's still have their landscapes at home and still remember the learning and insight.

    I've set up a facebook page to share LYL ideas and concepts to keep you on track. July competition is all about Milestones. I'm also sharing LYL videos on youtube which currently includes:



    * Going with, not fighting, the tide,


    * Stepping out into the unknown,


    * Looking around the corner (or going around the bend)


    * Getting out of the rut (pictures of which will be the August competition over on my FB page).

    I look forward to landscaping our lives together

    Alison

    alison@alisonsmith.eu 07770 538159

    Job satisfaction - how important is it?

    10 July 2011

    I’m currently working on a contract cleaning project. As part of this we’re developing the business requirements which has involved considering how we define what clean looks like. It’s also involved an assessment of current practice. This assessment has included the time taken to undertake the cleaning. Comparison of these times across the organisation may, along with other data gathered, enable us to identify best practice.

    Imagine then my quandary when I read in the Urban Worrier by Nick Thorpe about his experience of bed making at a monastery in New Mexico. He realised that his need for speed and competitive nature wasn’t enabling him to fully embrace the activity and enjoy it. So ā€œI give in and slow downā€... ā€œI would not, I suspect, win a hotel cleaning contract – but I defy you to find more contended cleaners.ā€

    As a procurement professional my goal is to ensure value for money for the organisation and have, and I’m sure will continue, to negotiate contracts that focus on speed to undertake activities. As a coach my goal is often about ensuring job satisfaction including wellbeing and passion for life. I just wonder whether, how and when as a procurement professional I should be considering job satisfaction of our suppliers?

    Are we each any better than the NOTW?

    10 July 2011

    On the one hand I join with others in outrage at the actions of some News of the World employees and contractors regarding phone hacking. On the other I wonder at our ability to forget we're often no different. Don't we, just like the NOTW, keep quiet until it's no longer feasible - whether that's in personal, commercial, national, international or global interests.

    Apparently the phone hacking took place 6 years ago - yet it's only now that anything has happened. Many people must have been involved and many more must have known about it and yet no one said anything - and not just Rebekah Brooks.

    It's as if a blind eye is turned until someone else gathers irrefutable evidence and/or we realise others agree with us and public opinion is on our side that we take action. It's as if when the game is finally over we suddenly start speaking up! Until that time we'll keep quiet along with everyone else.

    I'm very sad about the amount of time and media space taken on this story when there are many others that have more far reaching and significant impacts. I'd like to hope that this story signifies a change in people speaking up - I suspect however that it's the very fact that speaking up isn't personally impacting those doing it that nothing will change :-(

    What level of perfection are you aiming at?

    5 July 2011

    Last night someone on the TV said we must aim for perfection ie 100% because then we might achieve 95%. He suggested if we didn’t aim that high we would end up settling for 75%.

    I understand the sentiment but surely it can’t be that simple. After all much of my coaching and facilitation is aimed at helping those who are seriously and negatively impacted by their drive for 100%.

    I’ve been thinking about perfection since I watched the Red Arrows in an aerial display over Edinburgh a week ago soaring over us with such precision and yes perfection. Here’s where I’ve got to and would love your comments to help refine and expand my thinking.

    Whilst I don’t know what level of perfection the Red Arrows need to be at for a display I’d suggest it’s nearing 100%. It needs to be and perhaps that’s the key – if the risk is high enough the price paid (in any resources e.g. time, effort, Ā£ etc ) in achieving perfection is necessary. However for those flying with the Red Arrows I’m sure the activities they need to perfect are very specific. They’re not asked to be in armed combat or carry out other duties. They’re allowed to concentrate all their attention on perfecting a specific number of skills over a very specific period of time. I’m sure that must be the same for any other risky and perfection needing professions such as surgeons, emergency services etc.

    So what do I think we can learn from this?

    * Accept that perfection isn’t possible for everything we do
    * Allow the risk to assess the activities we wish to apply perfection to
    * And if we’re going to aim for perfection limit the skills we’re aiming for perfection in

    Vision, optimism, honesty & leadership

    21 June 2011

    Dangerous things tweets...... I tweet to say I’m off to do some #solstice scene setting for the year ahead and Charlie tweets back asking if I’ll share it on HRZONE ... so don’t blame me that’s all I can say...

    There’s a number of times a year when I take the opportunity to review where I’m at. How I do that depends on which aspect of my life I’m looking at. Sometimes I might do a collage, paint a plate or just go for a walk. Other times the templates might come out as I dive into some business or strategic planning tool. And other times I’ll get the cards out .....

    Today the cards in question are from the Frameworks for change Coaching Process but could quite as easily include other business or non business cards sets. Using cards can be a great way to tap into our inner wisdom to provide insight to the current situation. ā€˜Acting as if’ the cards do relate to the situation is what allows us to creatively explore the solution to an issue.

    If you want to find out more about the process then read notes from a group session here otherwise join me as I ā€˜act as if’ the cards chosen will provide some insight for me for the next 6 months. At the same time you may notice insights as you read my story and experience your own relationship with the cards.

    Vision: As I think about this card it reminds me to get my head up from all the paper, lists, objectives, goals, KPI’s, the cash flow forecast and all the rest and get in touch with the VISION of where I’m headed. If I was coaching myself I’d be asking what would it look, sound and feel like. And as I do that, even very quickly, I realise it’s very much about head up from PC and looking out and connecting with the world. Might not mean much to you but it certainly does to me.

    Optimism: I do know optimism will help but when we get a card it’s not about what we already know or are doing. We explore but what else we could be doing. So for me this is about remembering the physiology that helps me be more optimistic. I’m not sure the amount of time spent hunched over my pc of recent months really means I’ve been in an optimistic physiology much of the time. Must remember to sit up, shoulders back, head up and remember to move more often.

    I spent time wallowing in a state of negativity and unexpressed resentment: (yes the card set includes setbacks too) ouch - there’s certainly a theme going on - so what more is there to be gleaned from this card that’s not already been covered? *Pause as I think a little* For me I wonder if it’s the wallowing aspect of the card. An image of hippos comes to mind – do they wallow – I imagine it’s a great effort to do anything fast and perhaps they’d just prefer to stay where they are and do what they’ve been doing even if it’s not the cleanest water or a little deeper than they’d like. Mmm... so yes perhaps an antidote to ā€˜wallowing’ is needed and another reminder to get my head up.

    Honesty: (I’ve shared my personal response to cards in blogs and newsletters many times and often think I could just put a card back but never do and share in the belief that others will benefit too however uncomfortable this might be for me – thanks Charlie :-)). Although on reflection not too bad really as I think it’s honesty with myself. Perhaps I have just been wallowing and need to be honest to myself about that and take myself more forcefully in hand and get the body moving. After all it’s me who has the ability to make any changes not anyone else.

    Leadership: What I’m reminded of here is how I feel when I’m facilitating a group and the leaderships skills that I use then. It feels like I use these skills on behalf of others when coaching, facilitating or consulting but just manage myself through all those lists and KPI’s etc! What would I do differently if I was applying leadership to my own life not just trying to manage it? That certainly sounds different.

    I’ll certainly let you know how I get on with being more open to vision, optimism, honesty & leadership over coming weeks and months. Do share any insights you had for yourself as you read the blog.

    Transforming purchasing relationships with vision, optimism, honesty & leadership

    Alison

    The process, the insight, setback and mentor cards used here are from the Frameworks for Change coaching process Ā© Innerlinks - www.innerlinks.com.